Left Handed Curse
The right-handed people of this world have it good. How good? Well, it couldn’t be any better for them to be honest, that’s for certain. Here are just a few reasons why being right handed is preferable:
1) Supermarkets are DESIGNED for you. This is both good and bad. It’s good because you can find everything very easily, as everything good tends to be on the right hand side, and it’s bad because all the chocolates and other fattening things are constantly shoved under your nose. Not good if you’re attempting to shift some weight off your rump.
2) The whole “I’m left handed” justification thing. You must have noticed the looks and the gazing across the table as you eat. That’s right, sometimes by just saying you are left handed you are making yourself stand out: not always what you need to happen.
3) Everything on planet earth is designed for right handed people. This means that to buy left handed things is a specialist affair. No matter what it is, whether it be scissors, kitchen utensils or tools, being left handed means you have to go out of your way to get the things that everyone else can pick up easily. I am almost convinced that even saucony running shoes are made for right handed people (I have issues with the laces on them, more on that later).
Now, if I was in charge of things I would make all this common knowledge at school: had someone taking me to the side when I was five years old and said, “now look here, you may want to amend the way you eat things and become right handed, because for some reason the entire world has something against left handed people but we can’t go into that because it really is quite complicated and–well–you’re only five”, I would have smiled and said, “I didn’t really get all that but OK, I’ll try”. And life would have been easier.
Parents: take note!