Weird Old Life
Life can be weird, can’t it? One day you’re all alone, miserable, convinced you’ll never meet anyone, and the next something unbelievable and odd can happen, turning your world upside-down. One single click of the mouse can transform your life. Little do you know at that moment that nothing will ever be the same again.
I don’t usually go in for online dating, for the same reasons that you wouldn’t take your shoes off before running through broken glass: because my gut instinct usually tells me it’s a terrible idea. But what do I have to loose? I thought. I can’t remain a single man all my life. Think of all those poor women who are missing out on me!
Indeed, it would be extremely cruel to bar the females of this world from a chance meeting with a handsome hunk. With that slightly twisted logic roaming my head, I got myself all sorted with an online dating agency. And you’ll never guess! The next day I had fourteen women wanting to meet me and give me an innocent peck on the cheek! The fact that their names all began with M was a bit odd (the system appeared to have taken into account that my favorite shoes were mizuno running shoes and all my ex girlfriend’s names had begun with M and decided that why shouldn’t they in the future?)
I replied to Mandy, Miranda, Margaret, Mary and Mina (the other nine would have to wait a bit, sadly) and dates were organised. The following week I over-dosed on that best that M named female company had to offer in my part of the country, convinced that Cupid was not only about to fire an arrow in my direction any time soon, but may well have already done so (I was never any good at reading signals–)
So there you have it, online dating isn’t as rubbish as I thought. Maybe you should try the same. But be warned, always ask for a photograph first–